Gentlemen, welcome to Fight Crab. The first rule of Fight Crab is: you do talk about Fight Club. The second rule of Fight Club is: you TELL EVERYBODY about Fight Club! Third rule of Fight Club: if someone yells “craw!”, goes limp, or taps a claw, the fight is over. Fourth rule: only two crabs to a fight. Fifth rule: one crab fight at a time, shellas. Sixth rule: the fights are swords only. No claws, no guns! Seventh rule: fights will go on as long as they have to. And the eighth and final rule: if this is your first time at Fight Crab, you have to fight.