New dad jokes for new commentators:

"Do you know how to make Budweiser? Send him to school."

"When is a door not a door? When it's ajar."

"What do you call a cow that twitches? Beef Jerky."

"Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippie from drowning in the ocean? He was just too far out, man."

When I was a kid, my mother told me I could be anyone I wanted to be. Turns out, identity theft is a crime.

What concert costs just 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback!

Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer? He couldn't see himself doing it!

Enjoy!